The Cup of Commitment

The Gospels reference the Messiah as the Bridegroom at least seven times.  John the Baptist spoke of crowds going leaving him and to Yeshua, saying, “The one who has the bride is the bridegroom.” (John 3: 29) It should not surprise us to see parallels of a betrothal meal woven into Yeshua’s Last Supper.  A major part of the betrothal is the cup of wine.   But before we look at the second cup of commitment, which I am calling the cup of betrothal, we want to see how the two stages of a Jewish wedding were described in Yeshua’s message on Passover night.

The Betrothal and the Wedding

In Yeshua’s day, the bridegroom would first go to the house of the bride for a betrothal meal, Seudat Erusin. In front of witnesses the bridegroom would offer an article of value. We will talk more about what was considered sufficient value for the engagement in a moment. Once betrothed, she was legally bound to her husband, but they would not be intimate until the second stage of the marriage, the Nisuin, or the taking up of the bride.  After the betrothal, the bridegroom returned to his father’s house for up to a year to build a home for his bride, and only when his father gave the approval would he return to collect his bride.

We see just such an event in the parable of the wise and foolish virgins.  At the midnight hour, the cry went out, “Behold the bridegroom comes!” (Matthew 25:6)

Of course, this was a parable about Yeshua, our bridegroom, returning, “Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.” Matthew 25: 13 KJV

The Passover Promise

I want to invite you into that lamp lit Upper Room with the aroma of bitter herbs and unleavened bread.   Yeshua is holding the cup, and then he tells the disciples this Passover promise.

“Do not let your heart be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in Me. In My Father’s house there are many dwelling places. If it were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you?  If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and take you to Myself, so that where I am you may also be.” John 14: 1-3 TLV

This picture would not have been lost on the disciples.  This was the language of betrothal, and Yeshua was describing the first phase, the erusin!   But what article of value was sufficient to give to the bride?  A cup of wine!

A Betrothal Meal at Passover?

Today, it is not customary to become betrothed on the eve of Passover, but this was not always the case. The Mishnah, from the 2nd Century, preserves Jewish customs from the days of the Second Temple. Within its pages a perplexing scenario unfolds on the eve of Passover. A groom traveling to his future father-in-law’s home for the Seudat Erusin (Betrothal Meal) remembers that he forgot to remove the last bits of hametz (leaven) from his house!  What should he do?

“If a man was on the way to slaughter his Passover-offering…or to eat the betrothal meal at his father-in-law’s house and he remembers that he had left hametz in his house, if he has yet time to go back and remove it, let him go back and remove it; but if not, he may annul it in his heart.”[1] Mishnah, Pesahim 2.4

This humorous story gives insight into a lost ancient custom which may be the backdrop for Yeshua’s Passover meal with His disciples – the combining the betrothal and Passover meal into one.

In Yeshua’s time, it was customary to become engaged by the groom giving an article value to the bride. The Mishnah tells us that even a cup of wine was of sufficient value if accepted by the bride willingly. (Mishnah Kiddushin 1.2) Passover night, with all the family gathered, and multiple cups of wine poured, was a wonderful occasion for the betrothal meal!

But we remember that Judaism has long understood Passover as the betrothal between God and Israel, with the wedding covenant occurring at the “Feast of Oaths”, Shavuot / Pentecost at Mount Sinai fifty days later.

Conclusion

More than seven times the Gospels speak of Yeshua as the Bridegroom.   Our accepting the Passover cup that He offered is our acceptance as the bride. The betrothal was never meant to be a secret engagement.  A betrothal had to have witnesses.  I can only imagine the story that the Mishnah paints of this young bridegroom on his way to the betrothal dinner.  With all the guests around, he nervously held out the cup to the young woman.  Even in those days, weddings were not forced.  At that moment, she could still refuse.

“Therefore whoever acknowledges Me before men, I will also acknowledge him before My Father who is in heaven. But whoever denies Me before men, I will also deny him before My Father who is in heaven.” Matthew 10: 32-33 TLV

As we approach Passover night, I would ask, have you received that cup from the Savior’s hand?   No one will force you to take it.  But for those who do, they are joined to Messiah.  They belong to Him.  They will be the ones for whom Yeshua will return for one day.

Tomorrow we will examine the third cup, the cup of the Covenant.

[1] Herbert Danby, The Mishnah: Translation from the Hebrew (Oxford University Press, 1933), Pesahim 2.7, 139-140.